Hi friends, Story here! My mom has been in bed for the last week with a bad back, so I decided to write this week’s update and get you up to speed on my progress. For starters, I'm now ten weeks old! But don’t tell my mommy that because she gets very confused and always tells people I’m a different age than I actually am. When I was only nine weeks old, she told someone I was eleven weeks old and then twenty minutes later she told someone else that I was six weeks old. So I’m here to clear things up and answer your most important questions.
EATING: I really like to eat. My favorite activities are to eat, to spit up, to play in my baby gym, and to watch my birdy mobile. In that order. My favorite thing to eat is Mommy's milk. My second favorite thing is Vitamin D drops. And my third favorite is infant Tylenol. I like the pink stuff.
WEIGHT: Mommy weighed me this morning and I’m fourteen pounds. “Fourteen pounds!” Mommy said to Daddy. And then she threw me up in the air and I spit up three times. Once on her face, once on her chest and once down her back and in her hair. I love the way my mommy smells.
THE POOP REPORT: I’ve pooped three times since the H&M incident. Once, on my mom’s friend Caroline. Mom had to pay for her drycleaning. Once, when mom had her friend Elizabeth over, up my back, through two layers of clothing and all over my swing! And once when mom was taking my temperature. That last one was the most disgusting. I squirted all over the bathroom rug and got some in mommy’s hair. Whenever I poop she gets really excited and calls daddy to tell him all about it. She says, “Good job, Story.” If I even grunt a little bit, mom smiles. So I grunt a lot. Sometimes I grunt really hard and turn red just to make mommy pick me up and take me to the changing table. She gets pretty disappointed when she opens my diaper and there is nothing in it. It’s so funny.
BED: Mom and dad have me on a schedule now. I eat at 10AM, 2PM , 6PM, 10PM and again at 11PM. At 10PM, I get a bath. I just love the bath. Daddy holds me and mommy pours water over my head. After the bath, I eat again and then mommy and daddy turn off all the lights in the bedroom but one. Mommy holds me while daddy reads from Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein. Then daddy and I play the most fun game. Daddy wraps me up super tight and I have to try and get unwrapped as quick as possible. Then daddy wraps me up again even tighter and I have to try and break free again. Sometimes it takes me a few hours, but I always break free. I only wake up once at night now, usually at 6:00 AM. When I wake up, I’m so hungry. Daddy is very quiet when he slides me into the bed next to mommy. Mommy doesn’t speak to me while she feeds me, but she runs her fingernails over my head and I try very hard to stay awake so I can eat as much as possible.
This week, with mommy in bed all the time, daddy and I have been spending a lot more time together. Dad lays me on his lap and we listen to all kinds of music. Sometimes dad just sings me funny songs and makes funny faces. He especially likes to talk to me in funny voices. My favorite is when he pretends he is Shrek. My second favorite is when he sings the Hallelujah song like Count Dracula. Mom hates this and groans really loud whenever he does it.
Daddy’s skin is furry and he smells like tooth paste. When he holds me, I feel safe. He lays me down in the bed so very gently, he rubs his scruffy face on my forehead and gives me a kiss saying, “Goodnight sweet Story. Daddy loves you. May you grow up to be brave and honest and kind.” This makes me very happy.
That’s all the news for this week. I hope mommy is better soon so she can get back to telling you all my stories. Happy Monday!